Date Night?  Who has date nights when they are already in a relationship?  A lot of couples do!

Some like to call it a date night while others just like to have ‘time together.’  It depends on the type of relationship you want to have. This message is for those who want to create sparks.

I believe that relationships take work to keep them vibrant and alive.  Yes, of course you love each other – but that’s not enough to create sparks. By sparks I’m referring to energy and excitement at the thought of being together. It’s about letting your partner know that they are important to you and keeping the romance strong.

The first step is to set up time for the two of you to be together – a date night – a weekend away or even a vacation. My partner and I travel 2-3 times per year – for a night, a few days or a few weeks at a time.

We go out for dinner almost every Friday night. We go out to movies at the theater and talk about it afterward.  We share in each other’s interests. We plan activities together.  We can actually talk for hours at a time – just like we did when we were dating.

What makes our dates special? We:

  • Schedule time to be alone
  • Are both genuinely excited to be together
  • Give our undivided attention to each other
  • Don’t get distracted by our cell phones
  • Pay attention
  • Make eye contact
  • Smile at each other
  • Always hug and kiss each other
  • Share a spirit of curiosity to listen to or learn each other’s perspective
  • Make sure we are pleasant to be around
  • Don’t spend our time being negative or complaining endlessly
  • Share our concerns and offer each other support
  • Never swear at, blame or criticize each other
  • Make an effort to show we care
  • Show our gratitude for what we have as a couple

Other couples I speak to have their own chemistry and activities that work for them.  The common theme is they make time to be together and enjoy each others’ company. Get creative and try new hobbies – don’t complain – just have fun!